Friday, April 24, 2009
Harapan...Apakah itu sebenarnya harapan.....
Harapan yang semua miliki.......
Harapan yang mampu diberi.....
Namun ia harapan kepada impian yang tak pasti.......
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Harapan....Harapan seorang pencinta....
Walau mampu melalui onak dan duri...
Walau dapat tempuhi hutan rimba dalam kegelapan....
Gembira dan tawa......Tiada pasti...
Kerna kekecewaan pada akhir perjalanan mampu membakar diri....
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Harapan....Harapan seorang pencinta.....
Penantian demi penantian tanpa akhirnya........
Kekuatan diri hanya memakan hati....
Tangisan sering membasahi pipi....
Namun apakah harapan akan terus membara......
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Harapan yang kian musnah,tak munkin kembali....
Namun hati pasti pulih,walaupun perlu masa yang lama....
Pencinta terpaksa berputus asa kini,kerna penantian tiada erti lagi....
Harapan,apakah itu harapan....
Harapan pada impian yang tak pasti.....
Harapan yang tak pasti akan kembali..........
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Aku bagai Sang pendusta sentiasa dalam kekeliruan......
Harapan yang pernah diberi dihapuskan diri sendiri.......
Impian bersama dihapuskan oleh kesalahan sendiri......
Kini penyesalan tiada erti,hidup perlu diteruskan.......
Mimpi-mimpi indah bersama dulu tak mungkin kan jadi kenyataan...........
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Semuanya kan berakhir kini....
Tiada janji-janji palsu lagi......
Semua hanya tinggal kenangan......
Yang terbaik kan menanti di akhir jalan ini.....Insyaallah....
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Too many songs i listen to which bring back memories...
Just a lil too many.....
Guess i just sucks big time then....Have always been....
A Fresh Start...A New Beginning....
Sunday, March 8, 2009
This weekend seems to be my damn non-busiest weekend...Stayed at home slacking...At most,met my cousin n slack fer a while...Yapz...Nth much..Pretty boring weekend...But yeah...I guess,its more of,im pretty not in the mood to go out,just prefer to be by myself,be alone fer the moment...Need a break fer a moment....Results out last friday,Happy fer those whu did pretty well...Gd luck ppl..Congratz n go all the way fer what u guys aim fer....yeah!!!...as fer me,i wanna settle down fer the moment,take some time to reflect n think over properly watz gonna be my plans.....
Tomorrow gonna be a crucial day...Got my BCLS test,die2 nid to pass this test...My 1 n only step to getting to station....Yes...Fer now,datz my aim...Insyaallah im able to achieve it.....This week realie gonna be a busy week...4 weeks to go b4 POP....I gotta do this...Yeah....
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Its been a year since my grand-dad passed away....I realised i havent been sleeping over at my grandma's hse fer quite some time....But,not now....not in the mean time....Its jsut not the right time...Not that i wanna run away from reality,but,i gotta get myself prepared....Yapz.....aniwae,a few weeks back,we had a kenduri over at my grandma's place...lotsa foods as usual....i packed some foodback to camp...Hahaha....
Next weekend,gonna meet up wif the YOUTH!!!Been realie so long i met them,slack wif them n all...hopefully tonite will getta met them a while n nxt wk will be BBQ-ing wif them...Insyaallah..I've been hearing recruitments fer dian boys..yeay....realie fun to hear there's more boys...yerpz...n now,even though im feeling down,cheerful n crazy songs is what keeps me cool.....KOPI DANGDUT is the favourite fer now....Woooohooooooo!!!!!
A Fresh Start...A New Beginning....
Sunday, March 1, 2009
And so,afta 7 weeks....But truthfully i say...The POP is realie different from army n police....Family n friends are not invited to come...So the spectators was my fellow BP mates,instructors and the PTIs.....But yeah,all of us havebeen waitingfer this day....POP OH!!!!hahaha.....In the morning, we warmed up a lil and went fer a 10 km route march with our backpack on,happily singing our way....We were just enjoying ourself the whole way along the cemetries....Yeah...our route march was along the cemetries...from the chinese cemetries to the malays....Up anddown the hill,that's what make us realie tired....But yerpz...It's still a lot lesser thanarmy...wakakaka......We were made to rush to our Smartest 4 for the POP ceremony.....Evri single person was super smart with their KILAT shirts and boots....aftathat we had a gd lunch b4 rushing to pack our bags n off we go!!!!!At first,we were all looking forward to POP on thurs,cuz rumours was liddat,but....its still on friday...Nehmind....as a result,i missed the post-mortem session...yeah......Ermmm...i dun have any photos with me currently,so yeah......
And so,We were posted to ourvocation training....Definitely,i miss those times during the BRT stage...But now,we usualie meet each other coincidentally within the CDA,for others who are posted elsewhere,we'll just wait fer an outing soon...Yerpz.....And so yeah,im posted to the Medical Orderly Course,in which i have a chance to assist the Paramedic in the ambulance...Quite happening....Realie happening afta hearing stories from the instructors, cuz ur able to see what some other people dun getta see...in fact,u gotta handle it....Yapz....1 week gone....Im left wif 5 more weeks to go b4 i passed out from this course...Yeah!!!This time,family and friends are invited if im not wrong for the ceremony...Woooohoooooooo!!!!!!Definitely,this isnt an easy course...but i'll gv it my best....
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Currently,im realie missing Dian Dancers...Not able to commit fer now,cuz i usualie end at nite on the thurs...But then,i realie wanna perform soon....i was shocked this morning wen i wke up,cuz i dreamt abt performing...wakakka.a..sampai termimpi2....hehehe....I miss the people,the training,n now that i've recovered,i cant wait any longer toperform...Hopefully soon....Yapz....
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So yeah,wif my current hectic schedule,there's not realie much i cud do...there's abt 2 test going on evry week,and 2 weekdays going home at nite....Its quite tiring,realie tiring xpecially wenu have to stay awake in theory class,which is like 70% of the day....Woaaah.....realie a challenge to me...ermmmm....well....just gotta endure fer 6 weeks to come,insyaallah........
A Fresh Start...A New Beginning....
Saturday, February 28, 2009
It's been abt 2 mnths im enlisted into NS.....Oh well...And yeah!!!Lotsa things to update on!!!
Firstly, gonna talk abt the Dian Dancers Production on the 13th Feb...Yeah...Sadly to say,i din manage to perform at my very best....I was looking forward to it day by day,week by week, and i thought, on the day itself,i'll be able to be at my very best....But oh well...I realised regular practice is crucial wen it comes to a major production like this...Once per week is not enough to get u up there...U nid time to build up ur individual strength and as a grp....Yeah....Things got even worst when my health condition was at my worst on that day....but there's nth much i could do....From a realie minor coughing from the first week of enlistment,and turned into a major coughing problem for 3 weeks consecutively b4 the production,and on the production day itself,i got no voice...Initially during lunch,vomitted after taking porridge...Luckily condition got betta afta a while...Yeah,luckily im able to eat dinner...If not,i wud not have the energy....yerpz......
Manja kan...Hahaha...yeah...Kalau boleh nk suro haikel suapkan....Wakakakaka.....Ermmm...On that day,definitely,i wasnt at the mood of taking photos and all....Being crazy,irritating others like i always used to,i was pretty quiet,resting,worrying fer my performance...It was too fast...Without realising,its jsut a 2 hours b4 the actual thing...Running thru once fer me definitely wasnt enough...xpecially wen my mind is pretty slow on that day....
And yeah....At slightly b4 8 i tink,Dian Dancers Presents NADI........................I feel i was more stable on the first 2 performance...Gunung Payung and Joget Si Paku Geylang....I enjoyed both that performance...Fer the Zapin Gempita,it brought back memories during my SYF 2007,cuz it was the same song...But i din manage to do my very best...yeah..I feel i screw up that performance...Cocked up like mad...But yapz..I still do enjoy myself...I did give my very best even i was not at my peak...Yeah......I enjoyed like mad,shouting, making noises on stage even though i got no more voice...Luckily,tkda yg ter-off tune...hahaha....So yeah!!!!Rock On Dian!!!
So yeah...The Traditional part ended...For the contemporary part,i was supposed to dance fer Kebangkitan NADI,but then,yerpz...I wasnt at the last week of their training where, the choreography and positioning is changed and all....so yah....Good fer me too as i aint confident on that dance..But i love that dance..Its nice!!!wooohooooo!!!!!And the props,mcm RAIDEN!!!And the song..Power!!!rancak,Best!!!And afta the contemporary part,it ended with Alunan Zafin Kini Contemporary Version.......
I have not heard abt the comments cuz MY POP WASNT ON THURS!!!ermmmm....rumours was supposed to be on thurs,but end up its still on friday...So wat to do...i cant attend the Post-Mortem...ermmm...Hopefully,overall comments was gd...yeah....
And so yah....Evrione had fun on that day....Ermmm...And so,its been 2 mnths i've not been going for DIAN's thursday trainings....and now,looking at my schedule...I dun tink im able to commit to Dian fer the moment...Haiz....I miss DIAN!!!!.......Realie miss DIAN!!!!bila lah blh dtg training lagi...hmmmmm...............so,will update more later......
A Fresh Start...A New Beginning....
Sunday, February 1, 2009
Bintang
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Kan ku abaikan
Segala hasratku
Agar kamu tenang dengan nya
Ku pertaruhkan
Semua ragaku
Demi dirimu bintang
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Biarkan ku menggapaimu
Memelukmu
Memanjakanmu
Tidurlah kau di pelukku
Di pelukku
Di pelukku
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Biar ku tunda
Segala hasratku
Tuk miliki dirimu
Karna semua
Telah tersiratkan
Dirimu kan milikku
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Currently,im addicted to this song.....Such a nice song that i'll listen to it every nite...Well...other than it reminds me of sumbody that is...Songs that i listen to usualie have wonderful lyrics...yeah...So meaningful,and compared to drama and movies,it is more real and makes sense....Yerpz....But yah,i always control my emotions not to be carried away wif the songs i listen to as i know,i might end up in tears,wondering....Yeah....Though its 3 weeks to go,i foresee this is the last stretch whereby its gonna be the toughest....Insyaallah,evryting will go smoothly....Amin.....
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Aku akui, banyak kekurangan pada diri ini....
Aku akui, ku punya banyak kesilapan.....
Aku akui aku tidaklah sebaik mana....
Namun kata-kata yang pernah ku luahkan semua nyata belaka....
Tidak pernah ku memandangmu serendah begitu....
Ku hanya dapat berharap dikau tidak berubah....
Ku percaya ini hanya suatu permulaan....................
A Fresh Start...A New Beginning....
Saturday, January 31, 2009
3 Weeks to POP.......Something im looking frwrd to...Staying in camp wif minimal communication wif friends n all outside,its quite bad...BUt i have to appreciate that what we are facing now is more justified than people who are serving NS last time..There's more welfare n all...So i gotta appreciate it...Weekends has always been something im looking frwrd to at the end of each week...Its been almost the same routines each week.....but i screw up my day today...............................i totalie screw it up.....nxt wk wun be a good week while im in NS i guess...haiz....Hope it wun affect my performance during training tml and wen in camp....but i doubt so......Haiz.........................
A Fresh Start...A New Beginning....
Saturday, January 17, 2009
So yeah...This is my 2nd weekend afta my enlistment fer NS...Well...how have it been,its kinda tough at ferst...BUt im picking it up slowly,jsut dat,muscle aches have not recover yet...so its a bit tough xpecially when physical training gets more intensive...Drastic cutting down of smoking makes me sick...Well..din smoke in camp...n so,now im suffering from a bad cough...N its getting worst...haiz...i dun have much appetite to eat...yerpz....Hoepfully nxt wk wudnt be so tough cuz i wanna continue wif trainings,but if its tough,i might not be able to cope since im sick....But yah....insyaallah things will be fine fer me...5 weeks to POP...n then,will get my posting....Woooohooooo....Cant wait fer POP...20th February if im not wrong...Hopefully i will pass all the required test...Insyaallah....Shockingly,im in the Footdrill Comp among the companies...yeah...But its kinda fun i think...learning more abt footdrills...yeah....So afta 2 weeks,life in NS is mentally tough...1 week without family n all...while in the weekends,u gotta have a gd time management....xpecially wen i have a production to rush for... Yerpz.. I've just read the casting,but ermm...maybe im gonna back up fer some of it...Cant commit that much...n i cant bring my family dwn fer the production...cant bring them down to watch me dance...tix are sold out wen i wanted to order....No luck...totalie no luck.....Kinda dissapointed abt it..realie dissapointed...so yeah,dun have friends or families who come to support me i guess...haiz.......bt nehmind...jsut have to accept this fact n move on....Morale may be down,spirits may be down...but i'll just dance....fer dian's own production at least....yerpz.................
A Fresh Start...A New Beginning....
